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phoenixfire-thewizardgoddess · 17 days ago

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note to future me: the very specific headcanon about overlords being sent to protect other rings as a decoy when Charlie gets hidden somewhere else in hell bc heaven wants her

Alastor and Valentino get paired and sent to Lust

Ironically, Valentino is having The Worst time because the ring is modelled on other principles than just 'if you want 'em, love potion them to make it happen' which is his whole business model

The exorcists have decided not to care if hellborn are slaughtered since the old pact no longer works

the streets are cleared and Lord Ozzie is keeping everyone under surveillance to some degree, trying to coordinate with other sins about this whole concept. they hadn't been in charge of sinners before, much less overlords, and the powers these guys fell with were always a wildcard

exorcists arrive, and the pair grow to meet the threat, literally. Swatting them out of the sky with tendrils and poppets to eat them when they were downed, using smoke to disorient the angels and suggestion to send them against their sisters.

Generally confusing them.

The genius of the plan is that none of the overlords know which level Charlie is on so they all have to fight as if they are the last bastion of defence. Why do any of them care? Lucifer made a point to MAKE them care, beating down any resistance and offering a limited deal to each of them.

They protect Charlie for this scenario, he gives them a power boost... or he kills them if they refuse. They are also not allowed to harm Hellborn, and MUST obey the sin of the realm. And, almost infuriatingly, they all have to wear his sigil in order to pass to different Rings.

Alastor is initially tempted into refusing just for that alone, but Lucifer rolls his eyes and offers a ring, a bracelet and necklace option. Something less permanent that most overlords mark their own thralls with... nothing branded or tattooed at least. Shame it couldn't be cufflinks... Alastor grumbles as he takes the ring.

Still, as he had learned in life, a ring with a hefty front and embossing can can quite the little bone-crunching addition to any punch so that always boded well.

Alastor is originally frustrated he wasn't paired with Rosie, because she was lucky enough to go to Gluttony. He then hears tell that Charlie made a Suggestion to her father that (based on something Husk said that had no context) Alastor wouldn't like it there... because that's where Hellhounds come from.

The King had tried to work out why Alastor disliked dogs, but eventually switched Alastor out for Vox, and sent the Radio Demon to Lust. Possibly his own rude little joke... but lucifer can't possibly know.

Being paired with the moth is, ugh. Tactically, not terrible. Emotionally, draining.

They are winning, to some degree. So there was that, they were semi-compatible at least... though the fact the moth is using at least one hand and part of his concentration to text someone the whole time is grating on Alastor's nerves.

"Can you please focus on the incoming angels, Valentino? Whoever you're harassing can wait."

He'd been insulted in a language he didn't know, but the moth had finally seen fit to tuck the phone away and concentrate.

Exorcists always seemed endless when they came down on Extermination Day... this time, they at least felt finite. Something manageable.

The real issue was the hellborn. None of them had taken this threat seriously, assuming that Charlotte wasn't there or that no exorcist could breach other rings... most had never come up to Pride to see.

They milled about and then began shrieking in terror, running in panic despite knowing none of them could be targeted without the wrath of hell falling on heaven. Or, at least, that was the old contract.

It was alarming, now, how it wasn't immediately apparent if the old rules applied. In only seconds, it was clear they didn't.

Not only did the giant overlords have movement restricted by the populace running around and under them, but they also had oto pause efforts to swat the creatures from the sky, to try and save the little beings being accosted all about them.

Succubi, Inccubi and a mix of imps were desperately trying to hide, but Exorcists were used to finding. And the hellborn had never had to try this hard before. Easily located.

Soem sort of sheep with a candle on its head was impaled as it tried to talk to the Exorcist.

"Are you able to calm them down and send them inside with your smoke, by any chance?" Alastor asks.

Valentino tries, but it glances off the majority. "Too close to their own abilities, ciervo... unfortunate. Just step on them if they get too close. These angels are almost depleted."

True, they weren't killing the angels outright, not enough angelic steel... but grounding them by tearing off wings or concussing them into next year seemed to be doing wonders. A few of the less panicked hellborn were tying them up.

Some... it must be said, more erotically than others. But the knots were immaculate.

Either way, angels were being dealt with.

Not to say they didn't take the occasional stab here or slash there. A glancing blow from several exorcists working together to divebomb an Overlord... a nuisance more than anything. Still, they couldnt last forever, not like this.

Alastor throws up a shield when he sees the moth start to shrink down. It requires more concentration than he'd like, but at the pace they were going the exorcists could theoretically win if only one overlord was handling them. Their back was wide open, and the sy was endless... a lovely hue, though.

He'd never missed any non-red colour so much as the moment he'd seen the skies of Lust. He idly wondered the colours of other rings... tendrils sprouting on the shield to tear at the attackers. Stealing away their weapons and turning them back on the winged rats.

To say he didn't expect the sudden blow to the sppine was definitely an understatement. He'd felt Valentino expanding again, assuming he might be able to drop the shiled in another moment... and then something hit him in the spine, making Alastor stumble.

Before he can turn, the bastard bites him on the shoulder, ink ichor mixing with the sudden blood ruining his coat.

"What are you doing you fool, the enemy is still oout there?!" he demands, enraged, but holding up the shield. He gets a blast of that damned smoke rright to the face.

"Depends on how you look at it, really..." Valentino intones as Alastor's head swirls. "I like to think I'm bringing down the radio demon and getting a taste of something fresh... but on the other hand, I'm also fixing you so that my lovely Voxxy can stop sulking."

Fuck, he's shrinking... Valentino bats him into a nearby building, and the shield cracks. An massive hand slams his mere 7ft form into the pavement and the leering creature beams upon the reeling Radio Demon.

"Not sure why Voxxy has had so much trouble catching you, this was easy..." Valentino follows suit with his size and uses his arms to pin Alastor in place. His normal strength seems to be writhing under a liquid miasma that's filling Alastor's brain right now.

"What...?"

"Oh relax, I know some people get nervous but my venom should help with that... just lay there and let me put an end to this nonsense. You're such a little cocktease, and Vox has been so frustrating about it... if he can just have you, it'll be done with and I can have his attention back." Valentino rationalises, long tongue unfurling and dripping pink blobs onto Alstor's face.

He wants to rip the tongue out and feed it to his poppets.

Then, something unexpected happens, help arrives.

A number of the hellborn who'd been millig about had picked up the fallen angelic weaponry and were forcing the angels back, away, or skewering them. Others, however, were hurling things at Valentino and forcing him back at spearpoint, until Alastor could sit up and try to breathe again.

"Get away from him, man, we don't do force around here!" yells a succubus, jabbing into Val with a spear.

"Creep!"

"You should be ashamed, you freak!"

"Predator!"

"Artificial bullshit peddlar!"

"Ah, so they have heard of you in Lust..." Alastor slurs, through a haze. noting that Valentino was growing larger... and trying to get his own body to do the same.

Valentino was swinging at Hellborn now, ignoring the angels entirely, what few remained. He opened a portal of tendrils, but it was rather larger than expected... at least it got two of his lower arms and an ankle.

His shadow drunkenly caught an imp being hurled at a building from a backhand, setting them on the ground with some sort of grace.

Hands started to reach for him, and Alastor batted them away with mild panic rising in his throat, pulling at his core for the magic to take on Valentino again.

"Who DARES to harm my people?" comes another unexpected voice, and Alastor is rather getting tired of this mess. Even as he notes in bemusement that the ring Lucifer gave them is glowing.

Alastor briefly wonders if the Sin is angry at him for batting away the persistently gentle hands reaching for him...

But no, it appears the great Asmodeus and some sort of robotic imp on his shoulder? are there to beat the Overlord of Pornography into pulp. He's quite enjoying the show... but recalls, almost idly, that there are still exterminators to be dealt with.

He unleashes a number of poppets from the shadows... he's pretty sure some merged together by accident because those aren't his regular designs... but they take to the field in any case.

The shield flickers up again, fed partially by Lucifer's gifted power now.

"Hey... Sinner? Uh, not sure your name but... did you want to come sit down over here? I think that venom is making you unwell..."

"Holy shit, is that the... no, cant be... but..."

"Sir, can we help you? I can sense your mind is cloudy..."

He snarls at the hand touching his forearm, and they back off instantly. His mind catches onto the fact he just snarled, like a beast, at a lady-like hellborn and blinks sharply.

"Apologies... I seem to have lost my manners. I am Alastor, pleasure to be meeting you. Quite the pleasure. If you will go inside, we shall have the angels handled momentarily... and then I am tearing that good for nothing moth into confetti."

"It's okay, we just want to help. Lust isn't about force... despite the stuff we see from Pride... what we see from studios I assume belong to that guy Lord Ozzie is turning into paste?"

"Ah, the moth insignia... yes, that's Valentino. Rapist extrodinaire... a good friend is trapped under him, and in various other positions, most of the week. I have been meaning to kill the moth and free his thralls for some time." Alastor mused, then caught up with his vulgar statement. "Ah, do forget that little bit, it's going to be a surprise when I kill him and his lecherous paramour."

As if thiings couldn't get any worse, especially with the fussing civillians, Lucifer arrives. He takes in the sight immediately and drops to the pavement before Alastor. Hovering so they're at eye height and grabbing the red lapels.

"What did you do? What did you sinners do to set off the failsafe to protect the hellborns? I should have known you couldn't be trusted to do something s simple... first you failed to protect Charlie against Adam, and now this!"

"Your Majesty? It's not his fault... the moth sinner attacked him and did something. The other sinner was the one that knocked me out of the sky and threw my friend... Mr Alastor caught up and put the shield up." Said an Incubus, with an armful of shaking Imp.

"The moth attacked this overlord and the shield fell, so we tried to fight the angels with the weapons like we saw the sinners do... but then we saw what the moth was trying to do, so we went to stop him."

Lucifer pulled up short, noting that several smaller hellborn were edging between him and the bellhop. And with his red eyes, he Saw... that soemthing was wrong.

"What happened?" he tried, in a softer tone.

Alastor waved him off, "Nothing that they haven't tried before with his little spit trick or that blasted smoke or Vox's hypnosis... it will wear off in time. We need to handle the angels..."

"Why? Is this about the tv guy who's stalking you? Box?"

"Vox. Yes... when you tell him no, he gets obssessive. But now is not the time or place to have this conversation your majesty." He was very aware of the random people around him... and their phones. The cameras that turned to them as he stood there.

"Alright just, let me at least clear it from your system, once you're done here, we need you in Wrath. The angels are doubling down there, they think that's where Charlie is... hah."

Alastor weighted it up. "And what would this incur, Majesty? You already own the overlords, temporarily at least... what else can be offered? I will not leave the hotel, so take that from your mind right away."

"Er, what? No, I'm doing it because we're not quite friends but less than mortal enemies which i think is a real category of things you can be. But I've been wrong before..."

"Is this about the Dodo? I told you sire, they were a biological disaster and scientists have no idea how they lived as long as they did before extinction..." he mutters, accepting Lucifer's glowing hand on his cheek, and wondering why he allowed such contact reserved for friends, for the King. In a blinding flash, the dulling muzzy mess was evaporating into the aether.

Clarity. Finally.

"Do excuse me, I'm going to rip his wings off and make him eat them... then he will hand over his souls, and I will free them as he tantrums."

"No, wait up, we can do that later... one of those team building things Char Char wants us to try... but I really need you in Wrath right now. You're the strongest, apparently, and Carmilla and Zestial have their hands full... they need you. "

"I am loathe to leave the moth unattended..."

People could get hurt.

"Ozzie is treating him like a punching bag, and most of lust's denizens are immune to his pheromonal bullshit... now come on. I'll zap up back up to kil him later, okay? Just don't. tell. Charlie. I did that."

"You want to make that part ofthe Deal?" he grins.

A wing playfully clips his ear. "You overlords and that damn word, no, but I can do an angelic pinky promise for you bambi..."

"Of course you would, your lowness... your height isn't the only childish thing about you, it seems."

Lucifer laughed. "I know we fought when I first got to the Hazbin Hotel, bambi, but you're a fucking riot when you want to be. Now let's gooooooo, before soemthing else goes wrong."

Before he steps through the conjured portal, Alastor turned to the assembled attempted helpers. "Thank you for your assistance, please see one of the poppets when they come off the battlefield for my card... I believe several of you qualify for a Favour, for aide rendered."

He's gone before anyone can protest that they didn't need it, and that any good person would have stepped in... but it dies on their lips. And more than a few glance up at the sky in horrified wonder at what Pride must be like to see kindness as transactional like that.

How terrifying.

----

Further info and elaboration on the battle, Charlie is actually in Sloth but well-hiddenin the Sin's personal bed (its massive she's in amongst the stuffed toys), they push the angels back and things settle

go back to deal with valentino

free angel and the others

vox is dealt with too, as he was scoordinating it all through the phones.

#hazbin hotel #alastor #valentino #vox #other rings #idea #phoenixwrites #attemptedassault #Lust Ring to the rescue #a concept #its 4am wtf

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